Chocolate Granola

Hmm... What to eat for breakfast...

Cereal? Boring.

Yogurt? Blah.

English muffin? Again?? No way.

I've got your solution in the form of crunchy, chocolatey, nutty goodness.

Feed your inner (and outer) hippie with this chocolate granola!

Ingredients:

3 cups rolled oats (quick oats)

1/2 cup of each of the following: pecans, dry roasted peanuts, shelled pistachios, cocoa almonds

1/4 cup light brown sugar

1/4 cup cocoa powder

1/4 cup extra light olive oil

1/4 cup honey

1 tbsp ground cinnamon

Time commitment: 1hr 15min... But it's worth it!

Estimated cost: 15$

Yield: a LOT of granola

Preheat the oven to 250F. Chop all of the nuts to a medium-coarse chop and stir together with the rolled oats in a large bowl. Add in the brown sugar, cocoa powder and cinnamon and stir to evenly coat the nuts and oats.

In a separate bowl, mix together the honey and olive oil. They don't really come together well, but this helps to distribute them both on the granola mix at the same time. Add the mixed honey and oil to the nuts and grains and stir to coat.

Dump the coated granola mixture onto a parchment paper lined baking sheet and spread the granola around into an even layer. Into the oven it goes!

Bake the granola for 40 minutes at 250F, then bump up the temp to 300F and bake for an additional 20 minutes. Be sure to turn the granola with a spatula every 20 minutes to avoid burning it!

At this point, you're realizing that an hour is a long time. As someone who's willing to take the time to make their own granola, I have a few suggestions as to how to pass the time:

(1) Do a second round of yoga. Lots of child's pose.

(2) Backcomb your dreadlocks.

(3) Repair your torn tie-dye shirts with peace sign patches.

(4) Watch "The Best of Burning Man" on DVD.

Hopefully you enjoyed doing all of those things! I know I did (not). Remove the granola from the oven and scrape it into a large bowl to cool. How good does that smell?

Spoon your favorite yogurt into a bowl and top it off with some chocolate granola. You could even put it on top of some strawberry mousse (wink wink nudge nudge). Or just eat it by the handful; a particularly attractive idea for those without spoons. Store excess cooled granola in a Ziploc bag to preserve its crunchiness.

Going on a hike because your significant other is way more active than you are and enjoys watching you suffer? No worries! Throw some chocolate chips and dried cranberries in that same Ziploc bag and you've got yourself some mighty fine trail mix. 

It won't make the hike easier, but keeping your mouth full will stop you from complaining too much (like I do)!

Happy Crafting!

Handmade Gourmet Chocolates

It's rich, dark, smooth, and just the right amount of sweet.

No, it's not me. It's actually dark chocolate. But your flattery has been duly noted ;).

Not many foods are better than chocolate. What do I mean by "better"? I mean greater than in awesomeness. Don't over think it. Your tongue knows what I'm talking about.

Take your chocolate game to the next level, and make your own at home!

1 cup of high quality dark chocolate pieces

Double boiler

Silicone chocolate mold (or silicone ice cube tray!)

Ingredients for making the chocolates fancy (see end notes)

Time commitment: Does it matter?? (40min)

Estimate cost: Who cares it's chocolate!! (7-15$)

I suppose saying "make your own" is a bit of a lie, because we're really just re-molding pre-made chocolate and inserting what we like in the middle. I mean I have free time, but not that much free time. Maybe "re-purpose your own" is more accurate.

Forming these gourmet chocolates is analogous to smelting a sword. We'll heat up the material to liquefy it, pour it into a mold, and then insert what we like into it before it cools. 

Make chocolate, not war. 

By which I mean to say re-purpose chocolate, not war.

First, we'll need a double boiler. This contraption consists of one pot resting above boiling water inside another larger pot below (shown in the cartoon). The idea here is that the upper pot is heated by the boiling water vapor (steam) and not by the stove top, and thus will never reach a temperature hotter than the boiling point of water (i.e. 100C, or 212F for non-scientists) no matter how high the heat is set on the stove. This is critical to avoid burning the chocolate while you melt it.

Sure, you could buy a double boiler on Amazon. Or you could do what I did and set a saucier on top of a traditional sauce pot filled with about one inch of water set to boil. Save the extra cash to spend on more chocolate!

The best chocolate for this food craft is high quality dark chocolate, such as Ghriradelli, Lindt or Scharffen berger with greater than 60% cocoa content. Chocolate bars, chunks or chips will work fine. Avoid Nestle and Hershey chocolates if possible; in a pinch they're fine, but the resulting sludge is very viscous and gritty. I know this because I mixed some into the first batch (data not shown)!

Place about a cup of chocolate bits into the top of the double boiler and melt into a smooth liquid, stirring occasionally with a wooden spoon. Ladle the liquid into the chocolate mold, filling it about halfway up. Then insert the fancy ingredient of your choice (see below). After inserting your filling of choice, cover to the top of the mold with chocolate.

Once all of the chocolates have been constructed, place the mold in the refrigerator for 30 minutes. After this time, gently invert the mold onto wax paper to procure your delicious looking chocolates. Remove the extra chocolate fringe leftover from the mold before serving.

Finally, pat yourself on the back. I'm sure you did a great job!

If you broke some of the chocolates in removing them from the mold, eat them quickly to destroy the evidence.

I broke that one for dramatic effect, I swear!

A few suggestions about crafting your dream chocolates:

(1) Want the top of your chocolate to be coated in your ingredient? Add the ingredient first, then fill all the way with chocolate. This works best with powdered ingredients (cinnamon, cocoa, powdered sugar), as well as salt, finely chopped nuts, etc.

(2) You can layer in other sticky or viscous liquid ingredients between chocolate layers, such as peanut butter, fondant, maple syrup or other types of chocolate (white or milk). If your ingredient is more dense than the liquid chocolate (i.e. it sinks to the bottom), cool the first chocolate layer in the mold, add your layer, and then top with more liquefied chocolate before cooling a second time.

(3) Ingredients that will melt (bacon fat!) can be mixed into the melted chocolate before pouring. Just remember that ingredients with too much moisture (even honey) will cause the chocolate to seize (become hard) if mixed in. Moist ingredients are best left as fillings.

(4) The crazier the ingredient sounds, the better!

I'm sure I'll have a part two of this craft in the future. Stay tuned!